we're about 2 months out from when i'd like to officially wean em, & i have mixed feelings about it. i think the end of nursing for emma will be both sad & liberating. i am ready to have my body back, but i LOVE the quiet snuggle time with my girl. yeah, i know cuddles aren't exclusive to breastfeeding, but there's just something special about nursing that can't be replaced.
i would be more willing to continue if i hadn't recently developed perma-PMS (due i think to the pending return of you know what. yay me.) but the constant tired, crampy, bloated, backachey ickies are too much for me to handle for months on end. plus, em has recently gone distracted on me, & nursing now requires a totally quiet, dark atmosphere or she will pop on & off the boob constantly. i'm all for nursing as long as you're able, but for me i think i'm approaching maximum density. the prospect of nursing a rowdy toddler is beyond my abilities as mom. (i'm not knocking it, by any means. i think it's awesome if YOU can, i just know my limits.)
& speaking of rowdy toddlers.... sounds like naptime is over...
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Thursday, March 24, 2011
labels & therapy
the guys got referred to a speech therapist today (their 2 yr appointment) & conrad got an extra referral for an occupational therapist to deal with his food aversions. apparently all the spitting out/hoarding food is indicative of an actual diagnosable condition, not just picky eating. the doc thinks it's a sensory aversion, which renders him physically unable to swallow certain textures or tastes.
i have to say, i was expecting the speech therapy (the twin talk has slowed them down, although i still think their comprehension is fine-- it's just the ability to articulate words in english.) i was NOT expecting the OT. i *knew* something was up beyond the usual toddler food-control issues, but i was thinking it was a return of the dreaded reflux. we are, of course, going to embrace the offered help & take advantage of our killer insurance to get them the best help i can find, but i'll admit-- i had a moment of "but my babies are PERFECT! they can't need therapy!"
sigh.
& they ARE perfect-- each in their own imperfect way. i jsut have to remind myself that extra help is not a step backwards.
really, i think they're on the verge of turning the corner with their speech, so a little extra help is probably just what they need to break through. it's the OT that's throwing me for a loop. who ever thought picky eating was a medically treatable condition? part of me thinks that EVERYTHING is diagnosable in today's society, (cheating on your spouse? it's a sex addiction! a hyper kid? must be ADHD! overweight? clearly you had a traumatic childhood!), & if we left the kids alone, they'd work it out in their own time. but the larger part of me thinks that some extra training on how to feed a picky kid is a good thing, regardless of the label given to the behavior.
which suggestes the larger question-- why label at all? does it benefit us in some way to be able to say "he has a sensory aversion" instead of "he won't eat it" when explaining why the kid refuses baked chicken? what is behind the compulsive need to label things before treating them. does declaring yourself an alcoholic make it easier to refuse that next drink, or does it merely offer an excuse for WHY you can't put down the drink? does declaring that conrad has a sensory aversion give him carte blanche to eat only mac n' cheese? (as his mom, my answer to this is a resounding NO!)
as an aside-- i'm not saying that ADHD isn't real, or that having a traumatic childhood is not a legitimate reason to have weight issues, or that conrad doesn't have sensory aversions to certain things. for the record, i think the doc is right. i just question the wisdom of requiring a label to treat certain behaviors. i'd prefer to treat the behavior without stamping a big "XYZ disorder" sign on a person's head.
i have to say, i was expecting the speech therapy (the twin talk has slowed them down, although i still think their comprehension is fine-- it's just the ability to articulate words in english.) i was NOT expecting the OT. i *knew* something was up beyond the usual toddler food-control issues, but i was thinking it was a return of the dreaded reflux. we are, of course, going to embrace the offered help & take advantage of our killer insurance to get them the best help i can find, but i'll admit-- i had a moment of "but my babies are PERFECT! they can't need therapy!"
sigh.
& they ARE perfect-- each in their own imperfect way. i jsut have to remind myself that extra help is not a step backwards.
really, i think they're on the verge of turning the corner with their speech, so a little extra help is probably just what they need to break through. it's the OT that's throwing me for a loop. who ever thought picky eating was a medically treatable condition? part of me thinks that EVERYTHING is diagnosable in today's society, (cheating on your spouse? it's a sex addiction! a hyper kid? must be ADHD! overweight? clearly you had a traumatic childhood!), & if we left the kids alone, they'd work it out in their own time. but the larger part of me thinks that some extra training on how to feed a picky kid is a good thing, regardless of the label given to the behavior.
which suggestes the larger question-- why label at all? does it benefit us in some way to be able to say "he has a sensory aversion" instead of "he won't eat it" when explaining why the kid refuses baked chicken? what is behind the compulsive need to label things before treating them. does declaring yourself an alcoholic make it easier to refuse that next drink, or does it merely offer an excuse for WHY you can't put down the drink? does declaring that conrad has a sensory aversion give him carte blanche to eat only mac n' cheese? (as his mom, my answer to this is a resounding NO!)
as an aside-- i'm not saying that ADHD isn't real, or that having a traumatic childhood is not a legitimate reason to have weight issues, or that conrad doesn't have sensory aversions to certain things. for the record, i think the doc is right. i just question the wisdom of requiring a label to treat certain behaviors. i'd prefer to treat the behavior without stamping a big "XYZ disorder" sign on a person's head.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
if i were a princess....
is it just me, or is anyone else excited to see the royal wedding next month? i'm not usually a big follower of england's royals, but i am totally into this wedding. i've never thought william was all that dreamy, & although i think his wife-to-be is gorgeous, it's more the pomp & pagentry than the people that's got me hooked. it's real life (for them at least) so i'm sure it's no fairy-tale, but it FEELS like one to those of us watching & i think that's the allure. i was never a pink & pearls little girl; swords were more my style than tiaras, but deep down doesn't everyone sort of want to be a princess?
as a kid who was forced into skirts when i wanted sneakers, i always swore i'd never fuss over dressing my own daughter. as emma's first easter approaches however, i find myself ridiculously geeked about finding an easter dress for her. i've never been a girly girl. it's always been swords over stardust, & yet with my own daughter i find myself drawn more & more towards the pink stuff & all that goes with it. i promised myself before i had kids that i'd do my damnedest not to force my own preferences on them, but there's something about having a little girl that has turned loose my own long-supressed inner princess. i suppose i will have to let her make her own style choices as she gets older, but for now-- i plan to put the kid in an easter dress, strap a bonnet on her head, sip some tea & watch the royals!
(i must add as a postcript here, that em still wears her brothers' old jammies, & at almost 10 mos seems to prefer trucks & bugs to baby dolls! clearly, despite my best efforts, she is her mother's daughter.)
as a kid who was forced into skirts when i wanted sneakers, i always swore i'd never fuss over dressing my own daughter. as emma's first easter approaches however, i find myself ridiculously geeked about finding an easter dress for her. i've never been a girly girl. it's always been swords over stardust, & yet with my own daughter i find myself drawn more & more towards the pink stuff & all that goes with it. i promised myself before i had kids that i'd do my damnedest not to force my own preferences on them, but there's something about having a little girl that has turned loose my own long-supressed inner princess. i suppose i will have to let her make her own style choices as she gets older, but for now-- i plan to put the kid in an easter dress, strap a bonnet on her head, sip some tea & watch the royals!
(i must add as a postcript here, that em still wears her brothers' old jammies, & at almost 10 mos seems to prefer trucks & bugs to baby dolls! clearly, despite my best efforts, she is her mother's daughter.)
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Yup, they're really 2!
i just spent way too much on photo books, bc i am incapable of editing pitures of my kids. sigh.
i've been trying to keep up to date with our photos so we actually have albums instead of thousands of pictures on the computer, & i've been doing a fairly decent job, but i tend to buy in bunches, & like i said, i cannot edit.
it was my boys' birthday today, & we had a little family party for them. the dudes loved it, & we kept everything very chill. the grandparents (at least my folks), their aunt, & my cousin were our only guests & they still managed to get plenty of gifts. (i may have an inability to edit when it comes to gifties as well...)
the only annoyance for me today was my dad's continual griping over the amount of presents they got. (let me insert here, that they really didn't get TONS of stuff-- but every book was wrapped individually, etc, & when toddlers open gifts it tends to be a loooong drawn out process involving a period of playtime with each new thing before they move on to the next present, as any parent with a toddler could attest to.) anyways-- i got fed up with his insistance that it would have made more sense to give them empty boxes & told him in no uncertain terms to shut up & leave if he wasn't enjoying himself.
he quit the complaining after that, & i know he actually did enjoy himself, he just had to b*tch about it bc that's his way. the thing is-- i do NOT enjoy the b*tching. i hated it as a kid, & i hate it even more as an adult. parties are parties & they are meant to be fun. toddlers cannot be rushed & birthdays involve gifts, it's just how it should be. it irks me that i have to give my 63 year old father lessons on how to behave at a birthday party for two 2 year olds.
aside from that little snag, it was really a nice day, & most importantly-- the guys had a great time & loved being the center of attention. i could go on here about how far they've come, & what it means to me to see them grow a little more independant each day, but if i start down that path i'll shortly be in tears. so instead i'll just close with a wish that as my boys grow they keep some of the sweetness & shy charm that is so a part of their toddler selves. it's been a wonderful 2 years, & i can't wait to see what comes next!
i've been trying to keep up to date with our photos so we actually have albums instead of thousands of pictures on the computer, & i've been doing a fairly decent job, but i tend to buy in bunches, & like i said, i cannot edit.
it was my boys' birthday today, & we had a little family party for them. the dudes loved it, & we kept everything very chill. the grandparents (at least my folks), their aunt, & my cousin were our only guests & they still managed to get plenty of gifts. (i may have an inability to edit when it comes to gifties as well...)
the only annoyance for me today was my dad's continual griping over the amount of presents they got. (let me insert here, that they really didn't get TONS of stuff-- but every book was wrapped individually, etc, & when toddlers open gifts it tends to be a loooong drawn out process involving a period of playtime with each new thing before they move on to the next present, as any parent with a toddler could attest to.) anyways-- i got fed up with his insistance that it would have made more sense to give them empty boxes & told him in no uncertain terms to shut up & leave if he wasn't enjoying himself.
he quit the complaining after that, & i know he actually did enjoy himself, he just had to b*tch about it bc that's his way. the thing is-- i do NOT enjoy the b*tching. i hated it as a kid, & i hate it even more as an adult. parties are parties & they are meant to be fun. toddlers cannot be rushed & birthdays involve gifts, it's just how it should be. it irks me that i have to give my 63 year old father lessons on how to behave at a birthday party for two 2 year olds.
aside from that little snag, it was really a nice day, & most importantly-- the guys had a great time & loved being the center of attention. i could go on here about how far they've come, & what it means to me to see them grow a little more independant each day, but if i start down that path i'll shortly be in tears. so instead i'll just close with a wish that as my boys grow they keep some of the sweetness & shy charm that is so a part of their toddler selves. it's been a wonderful 2 years, & i can't wait to see what comes next!
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
a drive-by post
emmie's 9 mo. stats: 28 .5 inches long (77th percentile), 18lbs, 9oz. (44th percentile). she's shaping up to be long & skinny like her brothers!
conrad *may* have asthma, per his allergist & most recent appointment this week. we'll wait & see how things develop.
& this is just a random shot of val from today. springtime + running outside = pure joy. :)
i can't believe my boys turn 2 on saturday....
Sunday, March 13, 2011
i need a vacation
it hits me every year about this time, i feel smothered & blue & in desperate need of 2 days to myself. of course, i've never actually gotten 2 days to myself, but usually i can drum up a change of scene & flee the house (children in tow) for my folks' place up north for a week. not so this year however, as my parents already have plans to head north themselves.
i'm sick of cooking winter meals, i'm sick of snow & cold, i'm sick of the same 4 walls & unending routine of daily tasks & chores.
i would love to take a class of some sort at the local community college here. i think some sort of creative outlet away from home would be enough to give me back a bit of myself, but i'm having a hard time justifying the expense. i have to figure out something soon however, or i am going to crack & be unable to stop myself from picking unnecessary fights, just to break up the monotony.
i'm sick of cooking winter meals, i'm sick of snow & cold, i'm sick of the same 4 walls & unending routine of daily tasks & chores.
i would love to take a class of some sort at the local community college here. i think some sort of creative outlet away from home would be enough to give me back a bit of myself, but i'm having a hard time justifying the expense. i have to figure out something soon however, or i am going to crack & be unable to stop myself from picking unnecessary fights, just to break up the monotony.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Crafties (yup, again. but with pictures this time!)
a (not so great) picture of my first finished quilt-- every single stitch by hand.(you can see one of conrad's ratties in the background in the quilt photo. ah, rats!)our home-made crayons, which the guys love. i think it's the shape that appeals to them. a shot of the new (old) crayons in action with the boys, & little emmie finger painting with pudding paint-- she actually didn't eat that much, although she has blue lips here. :)
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