Wednesday, May 25, 2011

bittersweet birthdays

my baby girl is going to be one next tuesday. i loev first birthdays, but they're also kind of bittersweet for me. i love the baby stages, & it's hard to say good bye to those days, even though i know how much i'll love the toddler years.
we're having her birthday party sunday-- strictly a family affair, since her best friends are currently her brothers & the cats, we thought she'd be happiest with something simple at home. (i'm actually not a fan of crazy big parties for little ones. when they're old enough to start requesting what they'd like, then we'll start hosting bigger shin-digs. til then, family, pizza, cake, maybe a balloon or two. it's a good time, & plenty exciting for a baby!)

she is also almost weaned. i'm pry dragging my feet more than is neccessary in weaning her, since she will happily take a bottle & snuggles in lieu of nursing. & i know it would likely help the exhaustion i've been feeling if i wasn't trying to feed a baby at the same time i'm growing a baby, but i'll miss nursing her. she's growing so quickly, she talks all the time (mama, dada, bubba, kitty, ball, duck, quack, dog, bird, flower, bubble, night-night, bye-bye, hi, no, more, butterfly (fuh-fi), fan, & more i'm forgetting.), she can almost balance by herself & i know she'll be a real toddler in no time. which will also be awesome, i have no doubts.
i just don't want to give up her baby-hood quite yet.
i watch sister wives (love it! quilty pleasure- don't judge me!) & in an episode recently i watched as one of the moms tried to physically comfort her teenage daughter, who wanted none of it, & her mom just couldn't stop reaching out to stroke her hair, pat her shoulder, get in that one last squeeze. i could see my future there-- bc mom will always remember the time when her touch could make everything better, when baby's body was as much mom's as it was baby's.
sigh.
since i can't stop time, (& wouldn't really want to), i'll have to get my snuggles & squeezes while i can, & cherish her baby moments while they last.

2 comments:

  1. Happy birthday to your little one! I agree ... small and private is best ... and try to cherish those moments while we can!

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  2. Children getting older really is bittersweet. That is one of the reasons that I love homeschooling... I get to watch all of their phases in life and hopefully better maintain the bond of love in the home. P.S. That is so funny you like sister wives and have two Mormon friends... we no longer practice it of course but still. Oh, and if I had cable I'd so watch because it is kind of like looking deep into my family history.

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